My Hair

I know I've posted a lot about hair issues - specifically to black women - in the past year, but I haven't gone into depth about my own hair journey (or lack thereof). Today I think it's appropriate though, as I just sat down in the chair at the hair salon, took bobby pins out of my bun and looked in the mirror to see the dry nest of hair messily stay in place atop my head, though nothing held it there. I pulled my wide tooth comb out of my purse (because the fine tooth combs they have would probably break) and let the stylist go to work. What a task. My roots are THICK. The hair is dry to the touch. The ends, ragged at best.

I get to this point, every 4 or so months. It's a cycle. After about 1.5-2 months of silky straight hair, which I am mostly able to maintain myself, I go through another month (most time 2) of a series of braids, buns, and periodic (when I can spare the money) blow outs, before I get another touch up and trim and start the cycle again. It started when I went away to college, when I had not yet found a hair dresser in New York and would wait to go home on breaks to have my mom do it. Then when I did find a place up here, it was a money issue -- not that it cost a lot -- but when your funds are consistently on low, you cut corners where you can: No bi weekly hair appointments.

The newest guy I've been dating casually told me the other day that he's never seen me with my hair out. "Noooo! That can't be true!" I insisted. He replied that my hair came out of a bun in theory only. He even asked, "How long is it?" I had to stop and think about it. I realized that we started seeing each other in the middle of my hair cycle - the part that starts the consistent buns and braids.

Part of why I wait so long to get my hair done is financial. Yes, my income is greater than in college, but so are my expenses, and so I practically live on the same shoe-string budget. It's also a practicality issue because it's my job to sweat my hair out every day. So after a point, if I'm not ready to get another relaxer, it's futile and a waste of money to blow it out, unless it's a special occasion.

I've contemplated natural styles, which would alleviate the sweat it out dilemma. I even thought about how getting a weave might also alleviate this same dilemma. But I can honestly say that I like my hair as is. Moreover, any financial dilemma I'm facing in this predicament would probably also be faced in either of those other options.

Maybe I'm afraid of change? Maybe I'm just lazy? Maybe I don't care that much? Maybe I care too much?
That's where I am with my hair. Off to the sink to rinse out these chemicals...