Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Bitter-Sweet June

If you've been keeping up with me you'll know that June has been a whirlwind of dance happenings. In the past few weeks I have choreographed and performed a new work on Governor's Island with friend and collaborator Amy Jacobus; choreographed and presented a new work on a Bushwick rooftop; performed a new work with INSPIRIT; and helped put on a show featuring my K-5 after school students at the YMCA.

It is the dream. The sweet sweet dream. Sydnie L. Mosley: Dancer, Choreographer, Teacher is doing just that. Dancing, choreographing and teaching. I'm even in a business class right now to get a handle on the logistics of putting together my dance company (coming to you soon Fall 2010). I've actually completed my two-year plan 1 year ahead of schedule. Ha! I suppose a year ago, I thought I'd be administrating someone else's company while doing my own stuff on the side... definitely not.

The new two-year plan? I'll be adjunct lecturer teaching modern, jazz or African dance technique at some NYC college or university. My project-to-project dance company will be performing in more and more respected venues and I'll have some name recognition as a choreographer. I will be performing either in a company or continuously with multiple choreographers.

Accomplishing my goals really is so sweet. But I. am. struggling.

As summertime in New York City appeared with me doing all the things I want to be doing, so did stress, misfortune and pure exhaustion. From the complete obliteration of technology in my life (computer, ipod AND phone), to strained and changing personal relationships, to a tough employment situation and a tough living situation, it seems like each day in the month of June has been filled with another blow, and they keep coming, relentlessly.

I am always optimistic. I always count my blessings. But sometimes I have to just sit and recognize that this thing called life... is hard.

It's been a bittersweet month. I'm going on vacation in July. (And by vacation I mean a $20 bus round trip to Baltimore.) I need time to rest, regroup, rebuild.

Words of encouragement are welcome.

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